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Dave Barry Quotes - Page 29

All Quotes Age Arguing Art Atheist Beer Boat Business Character Childhood Children Christmas Cleaning Coffee College Commitment Country Dad Darkness Doubt Drinking Driving Effort Fashion Feelings Fighting Flying Food Football Fun Funny Giving God Golf Halloween Hate Hilarious Holiday Home House Humanity Inspirational Internet Journalism Justice Killing Kissing Literature Memories Mountain Music Office Pain Past Politics Pregnancy Purpose Rain Reading Religion Respect Responsibility Risk Running Sailing Sarcasm School Science Sleep Son Sports Students Stupidity Taxes Team Technology Today Training Travel Vacation Waiting War Water Weed Weight Loss Wife Winter Writing

'Escargot' is French for 'fat crawling bag of phlegm'.

'Escargot' is French for 'fat crawling bag of phlegm'.

Bags, Crawling, Fats

When to arrive at the airport?: You should be at the airport already.

Travel, Airports, Should

Sharks are as tough as those football fans who take their shirts off during games in Chicago in January, only more intelligent.

Football, Intelligent, Sharks

Biography/Personal Quotes, www.imdb.com.

I don't even care what Bill Bryson writes about because he will make it interesting. I love "A Walk in the Woods," about the Appalachian Trail, but his most amazing book is "A Short History of Nearly Everything."

Book, Writing, Interesting

Source: www.bostonglobe.com

Most recently I read Michael Lewis "Boomerang." The other guy I love is Bill Bryson.

Love Is, Guy, Bills

Source: www.bostonglobe.com

Miami, you can never run out of material. As long as you have Miami around you, you will never, never stop being amused.

Running, Long, Miami

"Dave Barry's Mix of Over the Top Humor, Seriousness Reflects 'Insanity' of Miami". "PBS NewsHour" with Jeffrey Brown, www.pbs.org. February 7, 2013.

With a novel, you have to have a story. It's much more important to have it matter to the reader what happens to people, and it has to make sense and end in a way that is satisfying. So I spend a lot more time thinking about that. Then the writing itself usually is easier for me, because I know where it's going.

Writing, Thinking, People

"Dave Barry's Mix of Over the Top Humor, Seriousness Reflects 'Insanity' of Miami". "PBS NewsHour" with Jeffrey Brown, www.pbs.org. June 4, 2013.

I'm happy to start on one topic and end on another one entirely, as long as it's funny.

Long, Topics, Ends

"Dave Barry's Mix of Over the Top Humor, Seriousness Reflects 'Insanity' of Miami". "PBS NewsHour" with Jeffrey Brown, www.pbs.org. February 7, 2013.

I have never had a point in my life to make. I'm just trying to entertain the reader.

Trying, Reader

"Dave Barry's Mix of Over the Top Humor, Seriousness Reflects 'Insanity' of Miami". "PBS NewsHour" with Jeffrey Brown, www.pbs.org. February 7, 2013.

When I'm writing columns, it's - all I'm thinking about is jokes, joke, joke, joke, setup, punch line, joke, joke, joke. And I really don't care where it goes.

Writing, Thinking, Care

"Dave Barry's Mix of Over the Top Humor, Seriousness Reflects 'Insanity' of Miami". "PBS NewsHour" with Jeffrey Brown, www.pbs.org. February 7, 2013.

By today's beauty standards, of course, Marilyn Monroe was an oil tanker.

Funny, Beauty, Oil

Dave Barry (2011). “Dave Barry Is Not Taking This Sitting Down”, p.168, Ballantine Books

Spreadsheet: a kind of program that lets you sit at your desk and ask all kinds of neat "what if?" questions and generate thousands of numbers instead of actually working.

Numbers, What If, Kind

Dave Barry (1986). “Claw Your Way to the Top: How to Become the Head of a Major Corporation in Roughly a Week”, p.43, Rodale

When I was a kid, I thought history was the most boring subject of all. I shouldn't blame my teachers; I should blame me, but I'll blame them.

Teacher, Kids, Blame

Source: www.bostonglobe.com

I never had the vaguest idea whether any of it had anything to do with me, especially being a sixth grader. When I got older and traveled, I'd read about the history of where I was going. I'd be like, "Oh, history is kind of interesting."

Ideas, Interesting, Kind

Source: www.bostonglobe.com

Unless you live in Indonesia, there should be several malls within five miles of your home. It makes no difference whatsoever which one you go to: Under federal law, all malls in the United States must have the same 42 chain stores.

Home, Law, Shopping

I don't want to dis anybody, but someone like Robert Parker. I first read a Spenser book maybe 20 years ago and then read every one that came out. I did that with Tony Hillerman too.

Book, Years, Want

Source: www.bostonglobe.com

I read a lot of lot non-demanding fiction.

Fiction

Source: www.bostonglobe.com

The Internet: transforming society and shaping the future through chat.

Literature, Computer, Internet

Dave Barry (2010). “Dave Barry in Cyberspace”, p.8, Ballantine Books

When I read that I had to go to Gettysburg.

Gettysburg

Source: www.bostonglobe.com

I'm reading "Team of Rivals'' I'll probably ending up reading a bunch of books about the Civil War. But I think my all-time favorite book about the war is the novel, "The Killer Angels'' by Michael Shaara.

War, Team, Book

Source: www.bostonglobe.com

For a while I got into the South Pacific theater of World War II. I read "American Caesar" by William Manchester, the biography of General MacArthur. Because of that I ended up reading "Tales of the South Pacific" by James Michener and then because of that reading his "Hawaii." That is what happens.

War, Reading, Hawaii

Source: www.bostonglobe.com

I read Warren Zevon's bizarre biography, "I'll Sleep When I'm Dead." His wife, Crystal Zevon, posthumously published a journal he wrote and some interviews with ex-band members. Like [Keith] Richards's book "Life," it's brutally honest.

Book, Sleep, Wife

Source: www.bostonglobe.com

I'm not sure you can count as history, was Keith Richards's "Life," which he so modestly titled it. I did find it a fascinating book. Keith's a pretty honest fellow.

Book, Keith, Honest

Source: www.bostonglobe.com

I walked out of the movie "Lincoln" and bought the book [of Doris Kearns Goodwin] at the bookstore next door.

Book, Doors, Next

Source: www.bostonglobe.com

One day soon the Gillette company will announce the development of a razor that, thanks to a computer microchip, can actually travel ahead in time and shave beard hairs that don't even exist yet

Technology, Hair, One Day

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